Forever Gone?
by HP Slash Luv
Summary: AU. Emily thought she lost Derek forever to Savannah.


**Title:** Forever Gone?  
 **Rating:** T  
 **Pairing(s)/Character(s):** Emily/Derek  
 **Warnings:** None  
 **Disclaimer:** Don't own 'em - not making any money off 'em. Dern it.  
 **Word Count:** 1,109  
 **Summary:** AU. Emily thought she lost Derek forever to Savannah.

 **Notes:** AU. Savannah never got pregnant.

Gift Fic for Bex (DobbyRocksSocks)

* * *

Emily stared at Derek. "So, you're choosing Savannah over me?" she asked. She wanted to cry, but she stopped herself. She would not let her tears fall because of him.

Derek shrugged, but his eyes were pained. "I don't know what else to do, Em. I feel like you're always holding me at arm's length, and I can't keep waiting for you to fully accept me. I'm the one who's supposed to have the commitment issues, but it's you that's stopping us from moving forward. I do love you, but I can't wait forever. Savannah's offering me what you refuse to offer me. What do you want me to do?"

Emily knew what she _wanted_ to say, but she wouldn't. Derek was right. The more he pushed for a commitment from her, the faster she walked away from him. "You should do what you have to in order to be happy. And if that's being with Savannah, then so be it."

That was how Emily and Derek stopped being lovers, and a few weeks later, she accepted the job at Interpol. She couldn't stay at the BAU, not when she lost the man who stole her heart. She knew she would never get her heart back from him, and it was worse because it was her own fault. All she had to do was stop running, and she couldn't do that.

Years passed. She had relationships with other men, but like with Derek, she always kept them far away from her heart. And they too ended up leaving her.

None of them hurt quite as much as Derek's leaving did.

She heard from Penelope that Derek and Savannah were engaged, and she wanted to run back to Quantico and beg Derek to take her back.

She didn't, though.

She didn't know what happened with the wedding, and she didn't ask questions. The less she heard about Derek's happiness, the better off she would be.

And only a year after she found out about Derek's pending marriage, she ended up going back to the BAU as they were in dire need of help because Hotch had to go into witness protection.

She took a deep breath and steeled herself before she walked into the bullpen.

The first people she saw were JJ and Penelope, and they both greeted her with hugs. Then there was Spencer, and he broke his self-imposed rule and hugged her as well.

She nodded respectively at Rossi and shook his hand when he held it out to her. All that was left was Derek.

She looked around but didn't see him. JJ elbowed her. "He's in his office. He's been spending a lot of time in there."

"Is everything okay?" Emily queried, her forehead scrunching up at the thought of something troubling him.

Penelope shrugged. "Ever since Savannah called off the wedding, my chocolate god hasn't been very sociable."

"Called off the wedding?" Emily gasped. She never imagined such a thing would ever happen. What was Savannah thinking? Sacrificing Derek? If Emily could go back in time, she'd do everything she could to save their relationship, and Savannah was just throwing it away.

The girls nodded, clueless to the emotions churning within Emily's heart. Spencer didn't seem quite as oblivious as he stared at her knowingly. "You should go talk to him," he pushed.

She met his shrewd eyes.

He nodded towards the office in silent encouragement.

Emily nodded back and made her way up to the office. The last time she was in there, he had broken up with her. And now she was going in, and she had no idea what would happen.

She knocked but didn't wait for an answer before she opened the door.

He looked up from some papers. "Welcome back, Stranger," he murmured as his eyes moved up and down her body.

She felt naked under his gaze but instead of embarrassing her, she felt alive. "They told me about you and Savannah. What happened?"

Derek smirked. "Emily Prentiss still doesn't beat around the bush, does she?"

She shrugged. "Some things will never change. So?"

"Are you hoping for a certain answer?"

"Maybe," she admitted. She lost him because she held back, and she would not make the same mistake twice.

He stood up and walked around the desk. He then sat on it in a comfortable slouch, and she yearned to touch him, but she didn't. She needed to hear his answer first.

"Savannah knew I cared about her."

She flinched at the honesty in his voice when he talked about caring for another woman. "If she knew you loved her, why did she call off the wedding?"

"I didn't say 'love;' I said 'care.'" He corrected her.

"Oh."

"I did care about Savannah, but she's a smart woman. And no matter how much I cared and did my best to show her I cared, Savannah knew I loved another woman and she couldn't compete. She never stood a chance, and she figured it out before I was done playing pretend. And she told me that I should stop fooling myself. It wasn't fair to her, it wasn't fair to me, and it wasn't fair to the woman that I loved. And that's the story of how I became single."

Emily was silent, unsure of how to respond to his admission.

Derek looked at her with a smile that made her insides flutter. "So, what are you going to do now, Em?" he asked, using his old nickname for her.

And that really told her what he _wanted_ her to do.

She walked to him so her knees bumped against his. He didn't move off of the desk as he waited.

"Just one question," she murmured as she leaned closer to him.

"Hm?" he asked, dark eyes focused on her lips.

"Why does it seem Spencer is aware? Especially when he's usually the last person to know these sorts of things."

If Derek wasn't so dark, she was sure he'd be blushing. "Well, I might have participated in a drunken rant about you and the situation, and Reid was the unlucky recipient of it."

Emily laughed as she closed the distance and sealed her lips over his.

Derek returned it as he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her down to rest against his legs.

The kiss was all fiery passion that had built up in the last five years. And they let go as they quickly remembered the other's body.

 _'It's good to be home,'_ Emily decided as Derek's lips trailed over her face and down her neck. "Very good to be home," she blissfully breathed.


End file.
